Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Yes, I'm A Dick Snob!!!

I am an admitted dick snob. Size and girth are important to me, but I don't like to consider myself a size queen. The most important factor to me is the knowledge of how to wield that sword. I've had sexual relations with some monsters who had no clue how to use that thang other than to cause internal damage. Back in the day I was actually scared of H.S.S. because he is packing, but since he's gotten older he's learnt when to please me with gentle strokes and when to tear my ass up with brute force.

So now I have high expectations in the bedroom, and I can reciprocate as well. Old girl has some tricks up her sleeve. My STBE husband used to jokingly blame me for getting him off too quickly. Pity he didn't know it was because I wanted to get it over with. Wait, he DID know!

But yes, I will not deny that I am a dick snob. Most guys I've slept with in the past have never gotten past 3 fucks. If they have then it means that they are bringing their A game, or B+ game at minimal. Should I decide to increase my body count in the future I know for a fact that I will not stick around if the sex is lame.

My friend says that is why I will forever end up with dicks - because that is what seems to hold me in less than ideal relationships. I beg to disagree. Can't two people enjoy a good relationship both in and out of the bedroom? Can't you love someone who loves to fuck just as much as you do? I've had old flames who have been great in the sack and on the street. I am friends today with a few of them. Our relationships never made it due to distance or other external factors but they were in no way dicks towards me.

I am looking for the winning combination of a good dick and a great personality. I don't see anything wrong with that. I know it's a high standard to set, but if two people are not sexually compatible then it is bound to create friction in an otherwise harmonious relationship. If one is willing to work on that flaw in their relationship, then good for them. For me, I am just looking for a used car that runs like new. Not a lemon with a blown transmission that needs its engine rebuilt. So yes chica, I will carry on, and ride that stallion off into the sunset.

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