Thursday, April 14, 2011

Live, Love, Thrive

So this is the title of the new Oprah Magazine for this month. I have never bought an Oprah magazine and I hardly ever watch her show, but the title caught me. Her picture caught me as well. Airbrushed and all, Lady O is looking fab! Yes we know she has enough money in the world to feed a country but we also know that money does not buy happiness. She looks truly happy and well. And the title is all about being happy and well. Living, loving, and thriving.

So this got me thinking about my own life and where I currently stand. Am I living or just existing? Am I loving or just metering out my affections? Am I thriving, or just stagnant without personal growth?


For the moment, I am just existing. I get up, drop the kids off, go to work, pick the kids up, run around and do errands. Go home to do chores. Prep for the following day, go to bed, and do it all again. I feel like I am on a treadmill sometimes. Most recently I have been feeling very overwhelmed. I do have plans to getaway at the end of this month. I am also trying to plan a vacation for the kids and I this summer. I know I need to take a break from the everyday mundane life, and live.


I have loved, but not deeply I fear. I have held back my feelings out of fear of feeling too vulnerable. This has gotten me in a pickle on more than one occasion, most recently with H.S.S. who was not sure of my feelings for him and did not know how to proceed. I have said it here a few times and I will say it again, I will not close myself off from love.


I have grown. Spiritually, mentally, emotionally. I am a different woman today than I was a year ago. I am independent and on my way to becoming a self sufficient woman. I still have goals and aspirations which I intend on achieving. The road to getting there has been tough, but I am still clawing my way out, tooth and nail.


After completing my self assessment I acknowledge that I am a work in progress. I embrace that and I am happy with it. At least I am evolving, slowly but surely, into the woman I was meant to be. As my goals become more clear, I am filled with purpose, and the drive to achieve these goals sustains me. Oh yeah, I got a copy of this mag from work today! Will read it over the weekend when I get a chance.

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