Monday, March 14, 2011

We Are All Prostitutes

Women that is. Don't get mad. Yes we are! First of all, let me define what a prostitute is. A prostitute is one who engages in sexual activity with another person in exchange for compensation, such as money or other valuable goods. If you have ever gotten anything of monetary value from a man, then honey, you ARE a pro! 

Pro What?

As women, our bodies are pawns in the game of relationships. Once we decide to settle for the most eligible competitor, it is usually based on a number of factors. Financial stability (or the prospect of such) is usually one of the biggest factors. He does not have to be balling and stanking rich now, but he must appear to have ambition and to be going someplace in life.

Prostitution does not necessarily indicate some kind of back alley blowjob. Nor does it encompass some scantily clad skank with bad makeup and horrid hair.  A prostitute could be as upscale as one of Heidi Fleiss's call girls. She could be as wayward and naive as Princess Di was. She could be the busy housewife down the street. She could be your girlfriend. She could be you.

Profiting from the Booty

Our body is our weapon. We all have phenomenal power in our vagina. There have been odes, poems, stories, and songs written about it. Monuments have been built, and cities have been destroyed because of it. What we have learnt to do over the centuries is to harness that power. We have been inherently socialized to not let anyone access the naani unless we are directly benefiting from it. (This is why they say prostitution is the oldest profession).  Now, how much we benefit is up to us. Some only gain a drink or two at the club from the naani. Some get to eat at a nice restaurant. Heck, some are even willing to trade it for the dollar menu at McDonald's! 

Again, how we profit is within our control. On the higher end of the spectrum, some women hold on to the goods until they get the ring. With the ring comes the aforementioned financial stability which every woman craves. With the ring comes unlimited access to the spouse's earnings. The sky is the limit with the ring. I have withheld sex from my STBE during the times I was pissed off with him. Whenever I wanted something from him, be it money or a favor, I would put it on him in the worst way. He knew what time it was. And I have no shame in my game. I was happy to get what I wanted, and he was happy to get what he wanted. 

Most recently, I have gone out and accepted drinks from men. No, I have not slept with any of them, but I suppose it is the promise of making conversation with me that initiates the buying of drinks in the first place. Conversation leads to getting to know me which potentially leads to bedding me. Unfortunately for them, it has not happened. I also recently accepted an expensive gift from a male friend with whom I have never been romantic. Of course I know there is an intent behind the gifts yet still I accept the niceties because I believe that if a man wants to approach me he should come strong. And, money is not everything but I have been around long enough to know that money is something and without it you can do nothing!

Dear Johns

So, if we are all prostitutes that means all men are johns? Yes. Sorry fellas, that's just the way it is. Before we decide to give it up we should first decide how much we are worth. Many women are selling themselves short. We don't expect much from our men (johns) so we don't get much. That independent woman mess is ruining potential relationships. Some men take women out and split the bill because they claim they do not want to insult us. Other men reverse the roles completely and expect women to take care of them financially! Nothing is wrong with being independent, but a man still has to feel needed. If he does not feel needed, he will not step up and fulfill the role you expect him to.   

When we do get a decent man we sometimes forget to "make him feel good", so he in turn loses interest and will sometimes move on. We have to play our roles, up the ante, and reap the rewards of our hard work, because yes, maintaining a relationship is hard work!


  1. Hilarious and I must agree. Being a woman is a powerful thing

  2. sorry if being a women were "powerful" women would be in charge, oops you aint.

  3. First off, women don't have to be "in charge" to be powerful. A woman can sit in the background and pull strings all day long, that makes her powerful and makes her a player in whatever game she chooses to participate in without taking center stage. As a woman, I can pull strings in almost every environment in my life without individuals pinpointing me as the cause or origin.
    As a second point, using proper grammar and spelling also points to education and power, though the power is mental and reflects on your ability to succeed in complex arenas in life. Your comment, anonymous, shows how uneducated and misled you are. It's sad, honestly, that I can tell how much a chauvinistic dunce that you really are; there was no tact at all.

    Now that I've gotten that out of my system, I'd like to point out the only flaw I had with your article. I believe that women are powerful, yes, and that most of the power lies in our sex, as this is the only power that many women are granted in our society (this is another point entirely, as our sex is not the ONLY power we have at our disposal; our ability to be empathetic and tactful get us further in life than our vaginas, sometimes). I also believe, however, that not all women use their power to get what they want, when they want it, from whomever they want it from.
    I've been in a dedicated relationship for over four years and I can say, without a doubt, that the sex I enjoy with my partner is in no way exchanged for goods of any kind, be it an allowance or a new pair of diamond earrings. Sex is an emotional and physical experience and the physical pleasure and emotional joy I receive from that is payment enough. I find it offsetting to see a relationship, a dedicated relationship, in which a woman will exchange sexual services (a blowjob, vaginal, or anal sex) in order to get something from him. It nearly disgusts me when I've heard from friends that they tried anal sex with their significant other so they could get that two hundred dollar pair of shoes they've wanted for a year. That is NOT what a relationship should be about and a woman shouldn't have to promise something good for her man in bed if he takes her out to dinner.

    A man that requires sex to feel needed and requires his woman to want to be taken care of in all aspects of her life is not a man in my eyes. A woman should be able to work, a woman should be able to choose when or when not to have sex, a woman should NOT feel obligated to put out, and a woman should NEVER feel or be told that she has to have sex in order to make her man feel wanted or needed. Sex isn't and shouldn't be treated as currency in a relationship.

    As far as women using their power outside of a relationship, power to them -- men are easily manipulated, so why should we not manipulate them with something so sought after? So long as it is on our terms, I see no problem with it.

  4. ...Or a woman can just like sex. I love how in our culture, a woman who has sex with someone because SHE wants to for HER pleasure is a 'slut," but the woman who gives her vagina to the highest bidder is somehow better and smarter. Fuck that.

  5. Appreciate the feedback! Great dialog. Keep it coming!