Wednesday, July 13, 2011
The Very Dead Ex
A few months ago I made a posting about an ex of mine who was trying to get back in touch with me. Well we have a bunch of mutual friends on FB who recently got together on a FB group and of course they invited his ass there. He of course couldn't resist the opportunity to talk to me and get into my head space, and of course I should have played Sub Zero on Mortal Combat because I was very cold towards him. He is still trying to get back on my good side after the bullshit he pulled in the past. That's exactly what he is. The past. He needs to stay there.
The Married Ex
He called me today with a sadness in his voice. It has been two months since I've called him. He called me once last month after Father's Day. I suppose he was waiting to hear from me and did not so he wanted to ask me what was up. He asked me why I was angry with him. I explained I was not angry with him as much as I was angry at myself. I felt that he did not take me seriously and I did not want to be in a one sided relationship, especially with a married man. He said he understood and knows it was unrealistic of him to expect me to continue seeing him. I asked him what he wanted from me or rather what he expected. He said he was not in a position to place expectations on me. I said fine, then asked how he would like us to proceed. He said I meant a lot to him and he was fine being just friends with me. In addition, he would love if we kept in touch more often. I accepted the new terms of our relationship. I don't know why but it was a very emotional 20 minute conversation for me.
Oh lawd! Drama drama drama. And now his family is becoming more involved. My sister in law is lecturing me about the importance of avoiding divorce and quoting scriptures on me. Where was her scripture quoting ass when her brother was not living up to his God ordained responsibilities as husband, father, provider, and spiritual leader of this household? Why am I to believe now that he has changed? After being apart for 10 months it is impossible to know whether or not he has truly changed. ASnd that same bible she quoted states:
"Can the Ethiopian change his skin
or the leopard its spots?
Neither can you do good
who are accustomed to doing evil." (Jer 13:23)
Anyway, she has been subtly hinting her disapproval of my decision to file divorce. Then Sunday night she made one last attempt to sway me, and after everything she said that I was always family to her even if I should remarry (which she mentioned was not approved in the Bible except in the case of the death of a spouse).
Her brother now has outwardly asked me not to file the dinvorce, then he told me to just discontinue all communication with him. I reminded him that he is still the children's father. His reply was that I should tell them about him and why we broke up. He just went on with his drama queen bullshit. And that has always been him. Woe is me. The world is against me. So glad I am moving on!
He called last night wanting to speak to the kids but they were at a party and he gave me the stankest attitude ever. He wants us to have a face to face meeting but I have been hesitant for various reasons. He complained about that and pretty much told me to forget about him. He called again tonight to apologize for his behavior and said he was just feeling down. That is him. Night and day. Typical Gemini behavior. I am so glad I am moving on!
My High School Ex
Since showing up at my house unannounced he came by again last Saturday as I was on my way out to an appointment. On Friday he sent me a text of his dick and I replied that we were not like that anymore so he was to stop sending me dirty pics. He said I was mean. Anyway, he came over and said he wanted to talk. I said I couldn't because I was in transit. He offered to take me to the appointment and I accepted.
As we were on our way we started talking about our issues and somehow it turned into a huge argument. He pretty much got offended by my tone and said that I spoke to him like he was a child. I tried to tell him that it was not my intention to make him feel that way while I was expressing my points but I could not get a word in edgewise. I decided to stop talking and started to send an IM to my girl when he snatched my phone. I was pissed to say the least. I would never have done that to him and I expect the same level of respect. I blew up at him and he tossed it back to me stating he was just messing with me because he wanted my undivided attention and I was blowing him off and ignoring him while he was talking. The ride after that was very uncomfortable and neither of us said anything to each other until we got back to my house.
He's called and texted since then, telling me that we are not done and we will never be done. I don't know what he wants from me. It took our first date for the Aquarian to tell me that he wanted to be with me for a long time and under a month for him to indicate that he wanted to be my boyfriend. If H.S.S. really wanted me then I don't think he would have delayed saying so. He's called and texted since and my response has been icy. I love him dearly, but I am just tired of the constant up and down with him.
My College Ex
I've never mentioned him here before because I have been out of touch with him for years. It's been at least 6 years since I've seen him. We dated during the latter part of our senior year in college. Our relationship was veyr hush hush because we were both private people and did not want our business being spread across campus, particularly in the very small black population. Anyway, after college he left and went off to grad school in upstate NY and I stayed back and married my STBE. I knew when he left that he was never gonna return so I let him go in my heart and went back to my husband who I had broken up with briefly while I dated my college ex.
Anyway, he found me on FB and of course he added me and we chatted briefly. We exchanged numbers and he called me. We spoke for over an hour. He apparently still has some feelings for me and is very much attracted to me. I have not told him about the Aquarian but I did tell him I was dating. He wants to see me again. I agreed to meet him for dinner when he is back in town. Nothing should come of it. Our lives are moving in different directions and that was how it always was. While he was chasing a career I was chasing a family. He did mention that he wanted to have a family soon. I know it won't be with me, but I would like to catch up with him soon. Will let you all know how that goes.
I think I may need a separate post for this but I have been getting a lot of attention lately from men I have met either online or in person. It's just funny how this sudden attention comes at a time in my life when I am content with one person. The Aquarian and I have a semi-open relationship which I will get into in another post one of these days, but I agreed to not date or see anyone without his knowledge, and he the same. To be honest, I am quite satisfied with seeing just him. He has been such a constant source of joy in the short time I have known him. I just wished that all these men were around when I was single and horny. LOL!