Tuesday, July 26, 2011

More Ex Encounters


So here I am, minding my own damn business. I pretty much keep a low profile these days. Haven't been out anywhere. I am between work and at home with the kids. I haven't even called anyone. I only call the Aquarian and my mother. And still the calls/texts/messages keep coming from exes (read guys who I have dated or had relations with in the past. Not counting the Aquarian, I've only been in 3 serious relationships in my life).


The Married Ex

Since he called me at my job about 10 days prior I did not call him. Lo and behold Friday night he calls. That is unusual for him, because Friday night is his family night. He was there hemming and hawing, said he thought I was going to call him to keep the agreement we made last time. I told him that I did plan on calling him, exactly two weeks after he called me. That was what we had agreed to. He asked why I had to be so precise. I cut him short and asked him to what I owed the pleasure of his call. He asked if I was interesting in getting a cup of coffee sometime. I am not a coffee drinker, so I told him a light lunch would do. I did not set a date with him and did not project a sense of urgency to do so. He asked me to keep a specific day open next month. I promised him that I would. A promise is a comfort to a fool.

The Gentle Giant

I call him the gentle giant because he was soooo tall but very gentle. He was 6'7, I am 5'. He said I was the shortest girl he was ever with. I believe him. LOL! I had the biggest crush on him back in the day. I was with HSS at the time and I was very faithful. It was not until we had broken up that I decided to finally sample a piece of his chocolate goodness. I sampled him twice. And left. And did not call him. It was not until years later that we found each other on the internet. Since then he has been kind of distant and now I know why.

Recently I posted a photo of my new bikini body on my FB. His tongue got to wagging and he left a comment indicating so on it. I ignored it for a while until he cornered me in chat and basically told me that I was the only girl who ever used him for sex.  He claimed he had feelings for me and was hoping it was the same for me. I did have feelings for him. But I also recognized very early on that it was just a crush and he would get on my nerves. Oh yeah, I moved over a thousand miles away so I was not into the long distance thing.

He asked if he could call me and I gave him my number. Told him it was not my intention to hurt him but I did not know he was feeling the way he was. He then asked me if it was just about the sex to me. To be truthful, it wasn't, but it was the main thing. The sex was great but he was probably the only man I ever slept with who refused to go downtown and that is an instant disqualification in my books! Our conversation was great until he indicated he would like to see me on my next trip home. I am done messing with discarded files in the recycling bin. On to the next one!


HSS

I did not tell you all about the recent  fallout between us. He called me two Saturdays ago, as he seems to always do. The conversation was very unlike that of previous times. It was as if he wanted to say something and would not. I got fed up with his evasiveness. That day I asked him what his intentions were for me. Why is he still trying to act as if we were cool, when there were lingering issues that needed to be addressed between us? I called him on it. I confronted him and he pretty much got off the phone as fast as he could.

Instead of calling back I decided to shoot him an email, which I knew he would read at some point. In the email I told him that I knew he was going through a lot of things, but it still did not excuse him shutting me out.I also blasted him about sending the sexts when I asked him to stop. I let him know that I was sick of his mixed signals. I was past the point of being that kind of friend. I was ready for something serious, and it was clear that I was not it for him. I told him I did not need a rebuttal, just an acknowledgement that he got it. I got no such response. Two days later I sent a text asking him if he was going to ignore me. He sent back an angry reply asking me what was wrong with me, telling me I was not the only one with issues, and informing me that he was working 12-14 hour days for a week straight. I did not respond.

So this past weekend I hopped in the shower on that very hot, steamy Saturday nigh,t taking my third shower for the day. I come out the shower and see my phone blinking, indicating that I missed a call. I checked the call log and discover that he had called 5 minutes earlier but left no message. I called back and left a voicemail telling him that I was just returning his call. He called back about 10 minutes after. What he had to say floored me.

He first asked me how I was doing. I was very curt with him and he realized it. He then decided to not beat around the bush for once and said he wanted to know where he stood in my life, because he did not want to lose me again. As I said, I was floored. I asked him what he thought. After everything I was just tired. I told him that have started seeing other people. He said that he had some free time this week and would like the opportunity to see me, just to talk. I told him to call me and let me know when. I did not tell him yes or no. A friend urged me to go and show him how fabulous and happy I was. I might do just that.


blkmsm@gmail.com

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